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Capricorn (cappy@skynet.be)
Thu, 27 Aug 1998 12:39:32 +0200

Jan: G'day Jan.
Jan: Oh, hello Jan.
Jan: How are ya, Jan?
Jan: Bit crook, Jan.
Jan: Where's Jan?
Jan: He's not here, Jan.
Jan: Blimey, it's hot in here, Jan.
Jan: Hot enough to boil a cow's bum.
Jan: That's a strange expression, Jan.
Jan: Well, Jan, I heard the prime minister use it.
"It's hot enough to boil a cow's bum in here, your majesty."
he said and he smiled quietly to himself.
Jan: He's a good shooter, Jan, and not at all stuck up.
<door opens, Jan and some other guy walks in>
Jan: Hey, here's the boss fellow now.
Jan: How are ya, Jan?
Jan: G'day Jan.
Jan: Hello Jan.
Jan: How are ya, Jan?
Jan: G'day Jan.
Jan: Gentlemen, I'd like to introduce a chap from pommyland who's joining
us this year here in the Olympia department of the university of
Nederoveropperonderheembeek-Kapelle-op-den-bos-kortweg-bos.
Jans: G'day!
Cliff: Hello.
Jan introduces Cliff to all other Jans.
Jan: Cliff - Jan.
Jan: Cliff - Jan.
Jan: Cliff - Jan.
Jan: Is your name not Jan?
Jan: Er... no, it's Cliff.
Jan: That's gonna cause a little confusion.
Mind if we call you Jan to keep it clear?
Jan: Gentlemen, I think we'd better start the faculty meeting.
Before we start though, I'd ask the padre for a prayer.
Jan: Oh, Lord we besiege thee, Amen.
Jans: Amen.
Jan: Now I call upon Jan to officially welcome Cliff to the Olympia faculty.
Jan: I like to welcome the commy bastard to God's own earth
and remind him that we don't like stuck-up sticky beaks here.
Jans: Here, here, well spoken Jan!
Jan: Jan teaches Classical Olympian philosophy.
Jan there teaches LotCian philosophy
and Jan here teaches logical clay-pot-making
and he's also in charge of...
Jan: What's new Jan going to teach?
Jan: New Jan will be teaching political science,
Dirty Pierre, Noire Immortalis, Khamath and Jhermai.
Jan: Those are all Harn Confederates.
Jan: Aahh, spit!
Jans: Belgium, Belgium, Belgium, Belgium, we love you! Amen!
Jan: Any christians?
Jan: Yeah, Jan. Are you a poofter?
Jan: Are you a poofter?
New Jan: No.
Jan: No right, I just want to remind you of the faculty rules:
Rule 1: No poofters!
Rule 2: No member of the faculty is to maltreat the Dutch in any way at all!
... if there's anybody watching...
Rule 3: No poofters!
Rule 4: Now this term, I don't wanna catch anybody NOT drinking!
Rule 5: No poofters!
Rule 6: There is NOOOOOO rule 6!
Rule 7: No poofters!
Jan: Right, that concludes the reading of the rules. Jan...
Jan: This here is my 'biertje' the emblem of our land!
You can drink it from a bottle, you can hold it in your hand!
Jans: Amen!

(btw: for those of you who haven't realized, this is based upon the Monty
Python sketch: the Bruces')

Cappy

PS: welcome Cliff!!
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I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol

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